rosesWhen you want to buy something lovely, something personal, something expensive for the woman in your life, three things come to mind, perfume,  jewels and lingerie.  If it’s her birthday, or your anniversary, flowers are another good choice. How then do you decide?
A brave man will pick one and go with it. A generous man might give all four.

There are no women who don’t like flowers, but remember her prestige is at stake. It’s great to send flowers to her at the office, but not if you send something small. If the lady in your life is the CEO she won’t appreciate getting a single rose if her secretary regularly receives 2 dozen. The best idea here is to find out what she likes and stick to that, or find something unusual which won’t invite a great deal of comparison.  Best of all send a flower which has some personal meaning to you both, for example I don’t care for carnations, but if my husband send me a bouquet of white carnations I’d love it because it would remind me of the wedding lei he bought me on our honeymoon in Hawaii.  If you don’t know her well you might find out the official flower of the state she comes from and send her that – again it’s something personal and shows you went to a little trouble rather than just choosing the first thing you saw on the screen.

Flowers , given properly, are very romantic, but remember that they don’t last. Roses, especially, can be very disappointing, lasting only a few days, though there are some companies that offer unusual rose arrangements which make quite a statement.

Perfume can also be a problem. There are simply too many to choose from and choice is a very personal thing.  The simplest thing to do here is either just to buy a lovely set of which ever perfume she currently favors, or to consult with the sephora fragrance finder.  The fragrance finder uses the fragrance she wears now to predict others she will like, and people say it is pretty reliable. Be aware the every persons skin reacts slightly differently with scent, what smells very very good on one woman, might smell ghastly on the next. My view is that unless you know her well and are buying something you know she has tried and wants, give perfume a miss.

Jewels are a good choice, but can be expensive.  Buying costume jewelry is fine when you are in a long term relationship, but it’s not the right message for someone you’ve recently met and want to impress.   Good jewelry tends to be expensive, but there are items which are a safe bet.  Every women needs a string of pearls and few women will say no to another, even if she already owns one.  Styles are always changing as are colors. A single strand of pearls 18 to 20 inches in a medium size is ideal for most women, but if you’re feeling extravagant, a multistrand twisted necklace is a fabulous gift. But beware of size. We forget the jewelry has sizes; the 16 inch strands used for necklaces these days will strangle a lot of women and cause a great deal of expense (having it made bigger) or disappointment if that isn’t possible.

Beautiful lingerie and sleepwear are items most men want to buy for their wives and girlfriends, but fail to, either because they don’t know where to find them, or they are looking for the wrong thing.

For women sleepwear is not just about sex. Sleepwear is about romance. Most women feel romantic in a long flowing nightgown.  Do you know what her fantasies are? Does she have a yen for Mr Darcy? If so a regency style nightgown would be a good idea. Feed her fantasies and it is far more likely that she’ll feed yours! Does she believe you when you say she has fabulous legs? If so a babydoll style might be ideal. If she works hard all day some lounging pajamas are a great way to help her change rolls, from workaholic woman to personal playmate.

Lingerie and sleepwear sizes can be a problem. The designer companies rarely sell anything above a size 12 or 14, and since the average american woman falls outside that range it’s likely that they don’t sell the right size for the woman in your life.

In that case use a made to measure service. There’s no need to worry about her size, you can add a touch of mystery and romance to your gift giving by becoming a ‘secret admirer’

Whichever gift you choose, women love to see their gifts well wrapped.  Use a lovely gift box, add paper and a bow, or at the least wrap in tissue and put it in a decorative  present bag.

If it’s any consolation,  your problem isn’t nearly as bad as hers, most women have absolutely no clue what to buy for the man in their lives!  You could always solve her problem by  suggesting she buy herself lingerie, as a present to you!

pineappleOne of the great joys of living in Florida is the constant supply of fabulous fresh fruit and very reasonable prices, making fruit salad the number one dish I like to eat in my nightgown or pajamas, preferably while relaxing by the pool.

I was expecting great fruit, after all, Florida is the orange and grapefruit centre of the world, but I didn’t expect the onions.  The red onions which are readily available here are potent but delightfully sweet, as well as being extremely good nutritionally. This, I must say is not always top of my list when it comes to reasons to eat something, but if something tastes terrific AND is good for you then you’d really have to be an idiot to turn it down.

So here’s the recipe for ‘sleepwear salad’ – tastes equally good whether you’re wearing a nightgown, pajamas or a robe!

  • 1 cup pineapple chopped
  • 1 cup red onion chopped
  • 3 tablespoons of blue cheese dressing

Mix together and enjoy! (Variations  – add parmesan cheese)

Makes a great breakfast or lunch and tastes great as a salad with dinner.

What you eat in your nightgown?

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Pure, butter colored silk nightgown with a halter neck and drawstring bodice.

Pure, butter colored silk nightgown with a halter neck and drawstring bodice.

What sort of hairstyle gos best with a nightgown? Not surprisingly it depends on the woman, the hair and the gown. I have a lot of hair. I consider myself lucky. It’s very thick, pretty straight and these days quite a lot grey, but you wouldn’t know that to look at me because my hair, like that of pretty well every other woman over forty, is dyed.

This weekend was pretty momentous for me because the color has changed quite a lot, from a reasonably modest red (which I’ve been for as long as I can remember, with occasional highlights) to a similar red but with additional, cold black and a shock of blond. The combination is quite striking. Note the choice of words. I’m not convinced it’s flattering, but it’s definetly striking! You would notice my hair.

But the whole thing got me thinking about the role of hair in a woman’s life. Hair is so closely tied to self-esteem, there’s no greater disaster than a terrible ‘do’ on a special occasion and no greater necessity than a new ‘do’ when life goes through one of those drastic changes. If you’ve recently become a resident of dumpsville,  a hair stylist is likely to be one of your first ports of call.

I’ve had my hair done all over the world, small shops, posh salons, cruise ships, 5 star hotels, and I’ve come to the conclusion that on a really special cocasion I’d rather do my hair myself. It’s not that I don;t want to have it professionally cut and professionally colored, but I’ve never yet had my hair done for a special occasion and actually liked the result.

I’ve tried to analyse the reason for this and come to the conclusion that it’s because of my weight. Hairdressers are trained to create styles which change your face to be as close to the idea of perfection as possible. That shape has always been the oval. Fat people of course all have round faces (no of course we don’t all have round faces, but bear with me), so the ideal hairstyle for us is one which lengthens the face – perhaps just long straight hair would be best?

OK. You guessed it, I wasn’t being completely serious. While some women do suit long straight hair, it’s certainly not the ideal for a large round face, yet look around and you’ll find it being recommended to plus sizes. I was once told it was ideal  because the long sides help to  ‘cover up’ the width of the face. Thanks. Why not suggest a paper bag? That would have the same effect, we could cut out eyeholes just to be sure I didn’t trip over my plus size feet.  I once asked a hairdresser for a bright copper shade. She ummed and awed for a while until she finally blurted out that it wouldn’t be a good idea because it would draw attention to me.  Apparently that was something to be avoided. I wonder why?

So I have met a very charming man who is a hairdresser in St Cloud, Florida. I am sure that when he looks at me he can, like everyone else, see that I am overweight. However he does realise that I do not walk around in a paper bag and has done what I wanted, let me have fun with my hair. Guess where I’ll be going in future?

Am I fat? Yes.

Would I like to be thinner? Yes.

Do I feel bad  and hate the way I am? NO!

Am I putting my life on hold until I am thinner? Definetly not.

These are not contradictions. I would also like to be taller. I’ve decided not wait for that to happen either.

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14 Saville Row, London, W1

14 Saville Row, London, W1

I’ve no idea whether the Queen’s designer ever created nightgowns for her Majesty, but I am sure that if he had, they would have been very stylish. Not chic you understand because Hardy Amies despised chic as being too much of the present, whereas, as we all know, style is eternal.

An intelligence office during World War II, Hardy Amies set up shop in post war Britian chosing an uninhabitable mansion in Saville Row (where else?) where Sheridan had once lived.  His early financial backers included Virginia Cherrill (once married to Cary Grant) and despite the post war regulation of, for example, the number of pleats on a skirt, built a reputation which lead to him becoming  designer to Princess Elizabeth, later Her Majesty the Queen.  He is said to have disliked the mini skirt, so it’s difficult to imagine what he would have though of grunge.

Why do I mention this? Anyone interested in fashion will be fascinated by the Hardy Amies archive, which has been opened at 14 Saville Row in London, to celebrate what would have been Amies’ 100th birthday. Entrance is free, but by appointment only.

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Pure, butter colored silk nightgown with a halter neck and drawstring bodice.

Pure, butter colored silk nightgown with a halter neck and drawstring bodice.

A wise man once said that the UK and the USA were two nations divided by a common language – certainly as a resident of 12 months standing (just) I am struck by the many differences between life in the UK and my new life here in Florida.

Most striking is the sunshine – even with the news reports of doom and gloom it’s pretty difficult to feel depressed in all this sunshine – and it’s equally difficult to feel good about wearing all those sensible wardrobe ‘basics’. While navy, charcoal and black are pretty well the only colors you see in the UK, Florida sunshine seems to demand brighter, happier colors which would be regarded as pretty poor taste in Bond Street.

But it’s in attitudes that the differences become really apparent. While a European woman will dress for herself – understanding that much of her appeal lies in her self-confidence – women in the US still seem to dress for others. When we talk to women about the kind of nightwear they want they keep telling us what their husbands like, invariably something short, transparent and not for the shy. When pressed the same women admit that they actually fall into bed in an old, but comfortable sweatshirt.

Ladies of America! The pleasures of silk, satin and lace at bedtime are many and they ARE for YOU and not just for HIM. The fabric feels fantastic -you feel feminine – relaxed, elegant, comfortable, cool, in all senses of the word!

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greynailsThere is a chill in the air and the leaves are starting to turn. Fall is here. Make sure you are ready from head to toe to feel and look great this season!

Starting at the top, hair. Think of going a little darker or adding in some low lights to warm up you color. Bangs are the way to go look for the style that best suits you. Bangs frame your face and give your style a pick up without a major change.

Time to go to your favorite make-up counter and stock up on wonderful colors for fall. Think dark purples for the eyes and more browns and burnt colors for the cheeks and lips. Keep it subtle but fun. Remember you can accentuate your eyes or lips not both. So, if you go for a dark smokey eyes make sure to have neutral lips. Conversely if you are wearing a fun crimson lipstick play up your eyes but keep the color to a minimum.

A scarf is the perfect fall accessory. Look for one that is wide enough to be used as a wrap if necessary but still light enough to be worn as a scarf. This will give you versatility. Look for a color that will translate with much of your wardrobe. My favorite color is purple so I use merlot colored accessories that are neutral enough to match almost anything but give me that little flare.

As far as clothing look for things that make you feel great. Fall is all about being cozy, embrace it. Find fabrics you just can’t stop touching that will feel great on your skin. Flowing lines and fun layers are a must this fall!

For nails the color is silver and gray. Have fun with it. Do a charcoal on your toes and a flat gray almost white on your fingernails. Remember lighter colors show chipping less, so toes are best for the darker colors. If you are feeling adventurous go for something with some iridescence and sparkle. Hold the bottles up to your skin to make sure you find the shade that goes best with your skin tone, if you cannot decide ask your girlfriend or manicurist for their advice.

One of my favorite parts of fall are boots! Look for lots of structure and a functional look. We will be seeing more cowboy and riding boots this season. Just remember not to over do it, your looks should be inspired by the ranch not functional for it.

This will be a fun fall, full of color and fashion. Stay tuned to be sure you have that Certain Style

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Evening Rose - Chiffon and lace nightgown - but is it lingerie?

Evening Rose - Chiffon and lace nightgown - but is it lingerie?

What’s in a name? Was Shakespeare right? Does it matter? YES! What we call things is extremely important. Yes, it’s important from the viewpoint of search engine optimisation and all that jazz, but get down to basics. There’s nothing more important than the elevator pitch and something I discovered the other day.

Question: what do you do? Answer: luxury nightgowns Result. A polite smile, but no real interest.

Question: what do you do? Answer: luxurious lingerie. Result. Oh really? Do you have a shop?

When is a nightgown a nightgown and when is it a piece of lingerie? The dictionary doesn’t provide any clues but when I asked around the answer I got was that lingerie is what you buy for your wife or your girlfriend, a nightgown is something you would buy for your Mother. What do we make at Certain Style? Well it seems we make lingerie. And nightgowns. Here’s a picture. You decide.

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